Remember when I used to write in this blog? I barely do. I feel like his heart surgery was a long time ago, but it’s never actually all that far away. More on that later.
Oliver’s takedown surgery (i.e., the surgery to reconnect his bowels) is scheduled for 7:30 am tomorrow (Mar 20). We had to check him into the hospital this afternoon so they could prepare him for tomorrow’s event. He had an enema to make sure the section of bowel that is tied off internally is in good health. He also had an NG tube put in so that they could clean out his system, and they are now feeding him through an IV.
Nothing about today was deeply traumatic by any means. But like any 10-month old, Ollie hated being strapped to a board with his hands above his head and enemized (not a word, but it should be) against his will. And of course he was angry about how many pokes it took the nurses to get his IV in the right place. And he really detested that damn NG tube. It took several sessions to get that thing inserted correctly, and the nurses responsible for this particular line of torture went from being objects of flirtation to recipients of death stares.
The worst part for me personally was being reminded of how unenjoyable it is watching helplessly while a child is put through painful and uncomfortable things he doesn’t understand. When I purposely try to reflect on it, October seems like a long time ago, and my memories of that time period are already starting to get a little foggy. But on days like today, some of those memories and feelings come back quickly and pretty vividly (and maybe even inaccurately; memories are funny things). I’m sure I’m not the first or only one who’s experienced this phenomenon.
On a positive note, I am happy that this surgery should be much simpler and more straightforward than his October surgeries. I hope, anyway. I see that on May 29, 2013 (less than a month after Oliver was born) I wrote, “I look forward to being on the other side of this uncertain period, and I can only hope that the road between here and there is not too difficult.” I couldn’t have foreseen exactly how things would shake out, and a few things ended up being more difficult and more drawn out than I would have liked, but I still stand by that statement, and I still have the same hopes going forward.
Here is a picture of Ollie from a few mornings ago. I hope he gives me this same smile tomorrow morning before his surgery. And the morning after that.